Proverbs 31:10-15 says, Who can find a virtuous woman? For her worth is far above rubies. 11 The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain. 12 She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. 13 She seeks wool and flax, And willingly works with her hands. 14 She is like the merchant ships, She brings her food from afar. 15 She also rises while it is yet night, And provides food for her household, And a portion for her maidservants.
Who is this virtuous woman? When she was going to be introduced in this particular chapter of Proverbs, the Bible says, who can find? Meaning that she's scarce. When something is scarce, it means that it is not easily found. That means the thing is precious. That means a lot of people are actually looking for the same thing. It is scarce.Who can find a virtuous wife? Meaning that in the world, virtuous wives are not found everywhere. So, who can find a virtuous wife? So, when you look here, you're looking for who? A virtuous wife! So, everyone is trying to find out, who is this virtuous wife? And the Bible says, her worth. Her worth means her value. Who can find a virtuous wife? Her worth, her value is far above rubies. Rubies are very valuable. Ruby is a precious stone.
When somebody finds ruby, the person has found something valuable. But the Bible is now comparing the value of a virtuous wife that, it is far above rubies. So the value of a virtuous wife is far she is more valuable than rubies. Why? Verse 11, because this woman is a kind of woman whose husband’s heart trusts in her, so that he will have no lack of grain. This verse 10 to 15 is an introduction to this woman. You want to know who this virtuous woman is, or this virtuous wife is whose price is far, whose value and whose worth is far above rubies. It said, she is the kind of woman whose husband’s heart will safely trust in her, so that he will lack no gain, no profit. He will not run at a loss. What does that mean? This man in his life and his destiny, he will not run life at a loss.
You know, when you see some people, they are running life at a loss. You look at them yesterday, and you look at them today. The person you saw yesterday is better than the person that you see today, that person is running life at a loss. A life of profit is a life that the scripture described and says that, the part of the just is as of a shining light, it shines brighter and brighter unto a perfect day. Meaning that a man or a woman that is not running life at a loss should not have a better yesterday. You should not sit down and look at yesterday and say my yesterday was better than today. That is running life at a loss, there's no profit.
A life that is profitable is a life whose today is better than yesterday. So, when a virtuous woman will see, will want to value herself or do an evaluation, you want to score yourself like a student that have written exam, is the life of my husband today better than his yesterday? We are saying these things not so that we will feel bad, it’s so that we know that we need to step up our game. This teaching is coming not as a condemnation but as an eye opener. So that as wise women, we can step up our game and glean from the wisdom of the virtuous woman.
So, when we talk about this verse 11, the heart of her husband, safely trust in her, so that he will have no lack of gain, meaning the life of this man today was better than his yesterday. And as women, we must aspire that this becomes our testimony. When somebody comes into your life, it’s not just your husband, when anybody comes into your life, the life of the person today in your life must be better than how it was yesterday. When somebody becomes your friend, and the person says, so and so person is my friend, the life of the person today, being your friend, must become better than yesterday. Because that's the kind of influence that we carry. That's the kind of life we must live as women that actually carry the wisdom of God.
Verse 12, she does him good. The reason why his today is better than his yesterday is because she does him good and not evil. Let's look at this, for example, you have a bank account, and you deposit money inside. And maybe you have a 100,000 inside your bank account, and every day, you go and withdraw 20,000. Will the account today be better than it was yesterday? What happened? You have made withdrawal, every time you go and withdraw from that accounts. What's happening to that account? It is reducing.
That is the same way the lives of some people are. When people come in contact with you, there should be deposits, not withdrawal. When somebody comes into your life, whoever the person is, including your child, what you should be doing to that life is deposits not withdrawal. You can’t withdraw from an account and it will be the same. It will reduce. So, the Bible says, this woman was always making deposits. Do we see it? This woman was always making deposits.
Wisdom Number 1: She does him good (She makes deposits)
Why is the husband always profiting? Because she does him good, she makes deposits and not withdrawal. How do you make deposits? We'll see how this woman makes her deposit. This woman, the Bible makes us understand that she rises while it is yet night to provide. When you provide, what do you do you give? That's why the Bible says, it’s more blessed to give than to receive. It’s more blessed to make deposits than to make withdrawal. So, for you to be that virtuous woman, for you to glean into the wisdom of this virtuous woman, you must be making deposits in your relationships. When people come around your life, there should be something you are adding to them. Are you praying for them? Are you giving them counsel? Are you helping them to achieve more in life or you are withdrawing from their lives? You are giving them counsel that does not move their life forward or you are cursing them? You know there are some people that if you come around their life, you will just know that your life is reducing, why? Such people are not walking in the wisdom of the virtuous woman.
As a virtuous woman, you must be making deposits not withdrawal. Jesus said pray for your enemies. Even to your enemies, make deposits not withdrawal. He didn't teach us to curse, he taught us to bless and to love, this is how to make deposits. We have being called to a life of making deposits, not withdrawal. Anybody that comes around your environment must be lifted, must be increased. I want to go back to verse 12 she does him good and not evil, did we see some days of her life? She does him good and not evil some days of her life, is that what is in your Bible? What do you have in your Bible? All the days of her life. So, she does not go on leave. She doesn't go on sabbatical. She does him good all the days. How many days are you doing good, how many days are you giving deposits? You say ah, ah, if somebody is making deposits, should the person not make withdrawal small? Is that your mindset? The reason the life of this man is making profit is because the wife is always making deposits. And what we are sharing today applies to different relationships in our life, not just marriage.
If your children are in your life, are you making deposits all the days or some days? Is it that there are some days, they will just offend you and you just say hey, don’t let me say what is in my heart oh and you’ve said it already? Is that what you do? Do you know that if you make deposits in the morning, and you withdraw it in the afternoon, the account will not change. True or false? You say but I made deposit now but you also made withdraw. The Bible says life and death is in the power of the tongue. With your tongue, the Bible says, with your words you are justified and with the same words you can be condemned. So, with your same mouth, you can make deposits, with the same mouth you can make withdrawals. We have to be careful.
Wisdom Number 2: She is Diligent
Verse 13, she seeks wool and flax and willingly works with her hands. She's not a lazy woman. The reason this woman will always bring deposits is because she's not lazy. She's not the woman that will sit down and be saying everything just tire me sef, I no even wan do anything. The Bible says she seeks, she looks for. When you are seeking something, do you sit down? Meaning this woman is a hard worker. Hard work is not a sin. Work is not a sin. Don't be like those believers that will sit down and say if God is God, shebi he fed the children of Israel with manna. Remember that the same God that fed the children of Israel with manna at a point apportioned farmlands for them to farm. Manna was because there was nothing to eat. If he had left them, when will they plant? Where will they harvest? They would have all died.
When it got to a point, manna ceased and they started harvesting the crops they planted. So, don't read the scripture one-sided, its important-hard work. That's part of the wisdom of this woman. Hard work is a wisdom, it is called diligence. The Bible says that see a man, see a woman diligent in his business, he will stand before kings and not mere men. See a man, see a woman diligent! Diligence is hard work. This woman with diligence seeks wool and flax and willingly, they did not force her or say go work now, why you just sit down like this? Wetin I go do na! Find something do now! Where I go find am! The Bible says, when you seek you will do what? Find! Are you seeking or you're waiting for manna to drop on your laps. The Bible says this woman willingly works with her hands, she's not lazy. That's the second wisdom of this woman. Number one she makes deposits, number two, she is diligent.
Wisdom number 3: She builds Capacity.
Verse 14…She is like the merchant ships, see comparison. The Bible says, she's like the merchant ships, you know merchant ships, when you see ships that carry containers. They are not small. They are huge. The Bible is talking about the capacity of this woman. She is like the merchant ships. She has capacity. She brings her food from afar. This woman has capacity. She does not sit down, she looks for opportunities from afar. She does not sit down and say if there’s no opportunity in Bwari, let’s leave it now. She will go out to look for opportunities. The third wisdom, capacity, build capacity. To walk in the wisdom of the virtuous woman, you must build capacity. Don’t say, this is the only thing I can do, outside this I can't do anything oh, no be my fault, I just no feel do am. Build capacity. And that's the wisdom of this woman. She is like the merchant ships. She has capacity. She does not just streamline herself to one small corner and say this is all about me. She has capacity. As a woman build capacity.
They tell you there's an opportunity to do this and you say eyaaah it’s not my line, I can’t do it. What stops you from going out to find out how to do it or collaborate with somebody that’s doing it, that's how opportunity will slip you by, build capacity. As a woman, don't just sit down and fold your legs No! The wisdom of the virtuous woman says this woman is like the merchant ship, she builds capacity. She could do more, she could handle a lot.
Wisdom number 4: Responsibility
Verse 15 she also rises while it is yet nights and provide food for her household and a portion for her maid servants. Wisdom number four, responsibility, be responsible. The Bible says she rises while it is yet night. Responsibility is what will make you stop sleeping and wake up. There’s this picture that went viral about a small baby that took remote and sat down in the parlor and was crossing his leg and somebody posted and said, see landlord no responsibility, nothing. Because that's a picture of a child. A child will wake up in the morning, care less about what is in the house. I am hungry and food must come out. But you are not a child. We must take responsibility. To walk in the wisdom of the virtuous woman, you must be responsible.
She rises while it is yet night, what makes her rise up while it is yet night? Responsibility. And provides food. Did the Bible say that the husband of this woman is irresponsible? Did you see it anywhere in the Bible that the woman married an irresponsible husband that's why she has all these virtues? No! Forget your culture. Let's talk Kingdom. This is the kingdom of God. Forget the Idoma, Yoruba, Hausa and Igbo culture. Let's talk kingdom. This is a Kingdom woman here. You must be responsible. This woman was responsible. There is a level of burden she took for the family. Did you see her as a full housewife? This virtuous woman, was she a full housewife? No! The Bible says she rises, she takes responsibility for the provision of her household and she gives a portion to her maid servants. Not waiting for daddy John to come. If daddy John does not come no salt. No salt, we will wait, He will soon be back 30 more minutes. That's irresponsibility. No matches? You will now be disgracing the anointing of Jesus on your life. You will now say mummy Mark abeg, matches dey? Daddy John never come. That’s irresponsibility. Live your culture, let’s talk Kingdom. This is Kingdom. If you are a part of the kingdom of God, this is the kind of life you must live. Be a responsible woman, that’s how to be a virtuous woman.
Proverb 31:16-20 says,
16 She considers a field and buys it; From her profits she plants a vineyard. 17 She girds herself with strength, And strengthens her arms. 18 She perceives that her merchandise is good, And her lamp does not go out by night. 19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff, And her hand holds the spindle. 20 She extends her hand to the poor, Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
Wisdom number 5: She is an Investor
Verse 16, she considers a field and buys it. She invests. She is investor, wisdom number five. She is an investor. A virtuous woman, a woman of this kingdom must be an investor, you must have an investment mindset. She considers a field and buys it, from her profit she plants a vine yard. Investment! A virtuous woman is an investor. She does not eat with ten fingers. She has profit aside. She has something that she can use to purchase a field. She has something she can use to plant a vineyard. She is an investor. What happens to that little land behind your house? You can do garden. Investment! You see something, make something out of nothing. Don’t sit down every day and you are just thinking if that my uncle for just remember me, ah God. And that’s what you are praying about and God is saying see, I have made grace available for you, look around you, see what I've made available for you. But you're waiting for one big miracle. She's an investor.
Wisdom number 6: She is Self-Motivator
Verse 17, she girds herself with strength and strengthens her arms. She girds herself with strength and strengthens her arms. She's a self-motivator. She motivates herself. She doesn't wait for somebody to come and strengthen her. The Bible says, she girds herself with strength. She motivates herself, she inspires herself. She doesn’t wait for other people’s motivation. Why not try this? She is seeing things, she is telling herself, I can do it. I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me. By my God I can advance against a troop, by my God I can leap over a wall. I can. I can! She doesn't need anybody to tell her what she can do. She knows what she can do in God. She motivates herself. The Bible says, and David encouraged himself in the Lord. A virtuous woman is a woman that encourages herself in the Lord. She is not waiting for a pity party. Eyaah, market is just slow these days, no be only you, na for everywhere oh. She says that, there something I can do to push this market, I can be creative. She encourages herself. This is not Idoma, Tiv, Yoruba, Igbo or Hausa woman. This is Kingdom. The Kingdom of Christ Jesus. This is how we are expected to behave.
Wisdom number 7: She Perseveres
Verse 18, she perceives that her merchandise is good, and her lamp does not go out by night. Who is this woman? This is a woman that perseveres. This is a woman that perseveres, that’s wisdom, perseverance! What is perseverance? Things are not working, but she knows they can work if she can put in a little more effort, if she can put in a little more patience. It might not be happening now but it will soon happen. That's perseverance; it’s a combination of patience and endurance. So, this woman is a woman that has both patience and endurance. Something is not working, she does not give up, she perceives that her merchandise is good, this business can still bring out so much profit and what will she do? Her lamp does not go out by night, she puts in extra efforts. It is perseverance that will make you put in extra effort to something that is not working. A woman that has perseverance. Ah, my husband’s business looks as if is not good, but I know that this his business will still work, let me put in more prayers, more counsel, more wisdom. That’s a virtuous woman. Do you see why this woman's husband will profit? Why the husband of this woman, his tomorrow will always be better than his today.
Wisdom number 8: She is not a Quitter
Verse 19, she stretches out her hands to the distaff and our hand holds the spindle.
This is still a combination of patience and endurance. This woman does not give up. She does not quit. She's not a quitter. This woman stretches out her hand to the distaff and her hand holds the spindle. She does not give up.
Wisdom number 8: She is a Giver
Verse 20, She extends her hand to the poor. Yes, she reaches our hands to the needy.
Who is this woman? She’s a giver. Out of that little you have, can you share? That’s kingdom. For you to achieve the result of this woman, you must be able to glean from her wisdom. How did she live her life? What are the things she was doing? She extends her hand to the needy. She's a giver. And givers will never lack. The Bible says give and it shall be given unto you, good measure, pressed down shaken together and running over shall men give to your bosom.
She does not just give money. If it's two salt that she has. She will give one, use the other one. See I don't have much in the house but we just got a packet of noodles, can I give you three out of it? She's a giver.
How do we live? To be a virtuous woman is not just by confession, it is by doing. What are you doing? Are you a giver? This woman gives. She extends her hand to the poor. She reaches her hands to the needy.
Proverbs 31:21-27 says,
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household, For all her household is clothed with scarlet. 22 She makes tapestry for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple. 23 Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land. 24 She makes linen garments and sells them, And supplies sashes for the merchants. 25 Strength and honor are her clothing; She shall rejoice in time to come. 26 She opens her mouth with wisdom, And on her tongue is the law of kindness. 27 She watches over the ways of her household, And does not eat the bread of idleness.
Wisdom number 8: She Prepares
Verse 21, She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household, is clothed with scarlet. She is not afraid of snow. She is not afraid of eventuality. She's not afraid of seasons; that season will change. This woman is one that prepares. Her preparation is on point. She’s prepares to the point where she's not afraid. How do you prepare? See the wisdom of Joseph, when Pharaoh had a dream, and said, you know what? I had a dream. I saw five fat cows and five slim ones. And Joseph said, you know what, this is what God is trying to say to you, there will be a season of increase and abundance that will come upon this land. And there will also be a season of famine. So that you don't suffer in the season of famine, it is good that you make preparation for that season. That is the wisdom that this woman deploys, she makes the preparation for all seasons.
So, she's the kind of woman that has savings just in case, money is not coming the way it used to, we must have something to fall back on. She is a kind of woman that she does not eat with our ten fingers. She has something somewhere that she can fall back on as extra. She's not afraid of snow. That means a lot. She's not afraid of the country's economy. She's not afraid whether dollar is increasing or decreasing. Why? She has made preparation for all her household is clothed with scarlet. They are preserved.
And if we're going to look at it again, we said she’s not afraid of snow. Snow is like a harsh condition, cold, harsh weather, like somebody been attacked. So, she's not afraid that her household is attacked because they are covered in the blood of Jesus. She has prayer covered them. She's not afraid that one uncle is coming from the village to visit, because nothing will happen to her people, because they are covered in the blood of Jesus, she has prayed and interceded for them. It means a lot. She's not afraid. So, as a woman in this Kingdom, you should not be afraid. You should be well prepared for all seasons. That's the wisdom of this virtuous woman.
Wisdom number 10: She looks good
Verse 22, She makes tapestry for herself; her clothing is fine linen and purple.
She does not take care of other people and abandon herself. She looks good. They will now say ma, how come you are looking like this? You will now say, it is well, we have to take responsibility oh. We have to take care of our household, it’s not an easy thing, that’s why I am looking like this. It's not complete. The revelation is not complete.
Verse 22, she makes tapestry for herself. She takes care of herself. She doesn't wait for other people to take care of her. She takes care of herself. Her clothing is linen and purple. When she comes out, people will know that this woman takes care of herself. That’s a Kingdom woman. She's not looking like somebody that came from 100BC that suddenly appeared in 2021. That looks out of place. She takes care of herself. So, women, please take care of yourself!
With all the responsibility, there is a grace in God. All these things we are doing, don’t do it in your strength. Do it from the place of rest. Be aware that this is who you must become. But don't try to become it in your strength. Rely on the strength of God, rely on the help of the Holy Spirit. Because the Holy Spirit loves you so much that even as you are doing those things, He will tell you take care of yourself. As He is concerned about your household and everybody around you, He is also concerned about you. That’s one of the best thing that can happen to anyone in this Kingdom is to have a relationship, functional relationship with the Holy Spirit. No one can take care of you the way the Holy Spirit will take care of you. There are days in my life where I will just feel like just throwing caution in the wind and just doing anyhow and the Holy Spirit will tell me, No, this is what I want you to do, I don’t want you to appearing like that, and I say reall? and He says Yes.
There are days I just say ah, I have done so many things, I've done this one. Let me forget about myself, and He says No, buy that for yourself. He takes care of you; He is your helper, your comforter. So, you must have a relationship with Him.
There are days when I am just overwhelmed by so many things and while we are just gisting and He says Omolara you are beautiful and He makes my day. He is one of the best things that can happen to you. As a woman, you must understand that see, God first. Don’t source your joy in men, source your joy in God.
The Bible says in the presence of God, there is fullness of joy. That's where you can get it. That's where you can get it, true! There are many women that are depressed because they are looking for joy where there is none. When you come into the presence of God, that's where joy is. And when you get it, the whole world will know you've gotten something. Because it will radiate in your life. In the presence of God is fullness of joy. So, get into His presence.
Verse 23, her husband is known in the gates
Who will not know the husband of this kind of woman? Who will not want to know the crown on her head? Who will not want to know the head of this woman? Who is her husband? A woman cannot be excellent like this, and you will not want to know her husband. So, the Bible says her husband is known in the gates, not because he's the husband of the anyhow woman but because, he's the husband of a virtuous woman.
So, if maybe your husband is not known and you're praying that your husband be known, can you be a virtuous woman? Because there are some things in the scripture that are just clear, they are just clear as it is. If you are praying for your husband to be known, can you be a virtuous woman? Because it is one of the keys here. Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land. He is not ashamed. Why? Because his wife is a force to be reckoned with.
Verse 24, She makes linen garments and sells them and supply sashes for the merchants. We're talking about capacity; this is a repetition of her capacity. This woman does a lot. She's not streamlined to one area. Strength and honor are her clothing. She's an honorable woman. She's a woman full of strength. She shall rejoice because of who she is, she shall rejoice in time to come.
Usually, this is what happens. Let me give this disclaimer. When you are living your life like this as a virtuous woman, some people will look at you and say, ah ah, your own is too much. Why are you even stressing yourself like this? Do you want to kill yourself? Calm down. The Bible says, she shall rejoice in time to come. So, when others are reaping the harvest of their foolishness, she will reap the harvest of her wisdom. That's why the Bible says a wise woman builds her house, and a foolish woman would tear down her own with our hands. Two of them are doing something; one is building, one is tearing.
The difference between the wise and the foolish is not because they are women, it is because one is a builder and the other one is a “tearer.” So, this virtuous woman is a woman that builds. So, for you to enjoy in times to come, you must be a builder. How does she build? Verse 26, She opens her mouth with wisdom and on her tongue is the law of kindness. She does not talk to people anyhow.
Verse 27, She watches over the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. All these ones are reinforcing the things we've read before.
Her children rise up and call her blessed. Why? Mommy, you've made deposits, our lives are an evidence of the deposits that you have made. So, they rise up and call her blessed. Her husband also call her blessed, and he praises her. See the praise of this woman, and if this is what you desire, then you must start walking and operating in this wisdom.
Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all. Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing. You don't build a house with beauty. But a woman who fears the Lord, this is the foundation. This is where this woman is operating from a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands and let our own works, praise her in the gates.
