In the last episodes of Better & Leading You, we learnt quite a few lessons. This video even promises more. If you want to learn how to maneuver your way through thick competition into success, then this video is meant for you. So, let us get into it.
Listen To Podcast: Success | For A Better Leading You”>THE LONELY MARATHONER: OVERCOMING 5 OBSTACLES TO PERSONAL SUCCESS | FOR A BETTER LEADING YOU
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Every race is started by all contenders. At the earliest stage of every growth, the competition is large and the terrain, very difficult. As time goes by, events unfold that changes the competitive landscape into a shallow landscape. The competition is further trimmed till each contestant has a space for himself or herself. At the beginning of every growth or development of an industry, the little or available opportunities are tightly contested for by every contestant. However, as the competition intensifies, some contestants drop out of the competition, and some are even disqualified. All that happen till only a few contestants remain in active competition or pursuit.
Since the new landscape is relatively larger than the new contenders, what then happens is the state of loneliness in the competition. While every competition begins crowded, as time goes by, loneliness sets in. I have realized that when every competition enters that realm of loneliness, certain things go on in the mind of the competitors, the mind of the contenders that we must look out as we learn crucial lessons from the Lonely Marathoner.
The first thing I have noticed observing a lonely marathoner is “I ALONE I AM ALIVE SYNDROME.” Of course, you understand that every competition begins crowded, however as the competition continues, towards the middle and the ending part of it, the competition becomes less intensive simply because fewer people are within the scope of pursuit. Of course, you should understand that while hundred people could start a race, as the competition continues, there is a tendency for focus to be only on less than twelve people because the available space is bigger than the number of the active contenders. There is a tendency for each contender to believe that he or she is alone within the larger space. I am sure you understand that.
So, the first thing you would notice is “I alone am alive syndrome.” When a marathoner is at the middle of the race, due to the fact that he or she could only see himself or herself in active pursuit, there is a tendency for such a marathoner to think that he or she is the only one remaining in the pursuit. While that could be comforting to the marathoner, it is not always true. So it is important you understand that even though you have gotten to a point in your competition that it looks as if you are the only one in the race, you must not deceive yourself, thinking that you are the only one remaining even though you could only see yourself. That is important and we must note it.
Besides that, the next thing I observed, looking at the lonely marathoner is: “WON’T THIS LONLINESS KILL ME? Let me wait for the rest.” When a marathoner has been in active pursuit for so long, and after running for so long, there is a tendency for the marathoner to think, since he or she cannot see others around him, then if he does not wat to die of the loneliness of his race, he or she should wait for others in the competition to catch up. When any marathoner comes to this state of mind, it ultimately results to the failure of such a marathoner. The fact that you cannot see people ahead of you in the race or people behind you in the race does not mean you will die of loneliness.
I am sure you understand that there are certain times we feel certain things which are not even real or possible. So, the fact that you think you will die of loneliness in this competition does not mean you will actually die. And should you make the mistake of waiting for the rest behind you, you may actually lose your own chance of attaining success in the long run. So, it is important you keep that very closely to your heart. That while a lot of marathoner at the lonely stage of their marathon race have this syndrome of “I alone I am alive”, is not always true. And some also think that if they continue in this loneliness, they might die. That is also not true. So, there is no point waiting for the rest because you will only be jeopardizing your own chance of attaining victory in that race.
The third thing I realize observing the lonely marathoner is “IF ONLY I CAN PUT IN MORE EFFORT, I CAN JOIN UP WITH OTHERS AHEAD OF ME.” If you observe anyways, you would notice that there are layers of progress. There are peers in every layer, there are people that are joined together by their speed or by their attitudes in the race. So, while there could be twelve people in pursuit, there is a tendency for you to have them in groups of three or four. And there is also the possibility of a marathoner to find himself or herself running alone. Of course, it is good to aim high. But if you keep telling yourself that if only you could put more effort, you would move forward and catch up with others, as good as that sounds, it is also like you trying to compare yourself with people, not working according to your own pace.
You see, for every person in active pursuit, for everyone running, for everyone engaging in life, you have your speed, you have your capacity and you have your range of strength. Trying to catch up with others is trying to measure yourself by others, which is not healthy. You must not assume that if only you can put it more effort, you would catch up, because you could only realize that perhaps, you are even one of the leading contenders in the same race that are worried about. Imagine someone who is in front of everybody else, thinking that if only he or she could put in more effort, then he or she will no longer be lonely in the race, only to realize after putting so much effort, that there is no one ahead. Everyone is behind. Do you imagine the stress that that could cost such a contestant?
Another thing that I have observed looking at the lonely marathoner is BOREDOM. Of course, while a few people could enjoy running alone, enjoying the breeze, and you know, the adrenaline of the race; most people would consider running alone in any race to be a boring exercise. While some could have the prize in view and use the prize to encourage themselves. Most people will consider such a lonely race to be a boring race. Something they must get out of. I am sure you must have seen different people in different places who share their story with you, that they’ve been in such a point, they have been at so level before.
However, at the point they are talking to you. They are far below who they claim they used to be. What usually results to that is, when somebody is attaining a higher level in life, only for he or she to think that whatever he or she is doing that is giving such an advancement, is creating boredom around him or her, such a person would definitely abandon whatever he or she considers to be boring. So, whatever you consider to be boring is something you would likely not finish. If you must finish that race, if you must end the competition as a winner, then you must not tell yourself that what you are doing is a boring exercise. That is very important and I want you to note it.
The next thing I observed looking at a lonely marathoner is LACK OF MOTIVATION. When you notice that when marathoners are flocking with themselves in such a crowded state, there is a tendency for them to encourage themselves from themselves; to use other contenders, other competitors to gain strength for themselves. They tell themselves “so and so person is catching up with me, let me move more. So, and so person is close to me, let me move away.” As long as they see people around them, they are motivated. But what happens when marathoners get to that state of loneliness is that they lack motivation that many people rely on, getting stimulus from their environment. Little things get to excite them so they have lesser room to draw energy from their environment. They now need to depend on themselves for strength. The very thing many people do not want to do.
For every marathoner that successfully overcome these issues that I have mentioned earlier; ‘I alone I am alive syndrome,’ ‘won’t this loneliness kill me, let me wait for the rest,’ ‘If only I can put in more effort, I can join up with others ahead of me,’ ‘boredom and lack of motivation.’ Any marathoner that successfully overcome these states of mind is definitely going to be able to finish what he or she has started, knowing fully well that it is not enough to start great race with great strength, you must be able to finish it with even a greater strength. And if you must finish the race with a greater strength that you have started, if you must finish in this industry as a leader, this new product that you have released, if you must continue to be a leader in the product, in the service that you are offering, then you must be able to overcome the “lack of motivation,’ ‘the boredom,’ ‘if only I can put in more effort, I will catch up with those ahead of me,’ the ‘won’t this loneliness kill me, let me wait for the rest.’
The point is you are not indeed alone in the race. Don’t tell yourself, you are the only one alone in the race. Again, you must understand that you do not need to wait for the rest coming from behind because you cannot determine the pace of your competition, you can only determine your own pace and so it’s good that you go in the race, in your own pace. Again, you must not forget that there is no need to overwork yourself trying to catch up with the contenders ahead of you, you have your space, move in your strength, move at your own pace and you will achieve success. And again, if you think what you are doing is boring, the truth is you will never finish it.
If you must finish what you have started, you must stay clear from boredom, you must not tell yourself this is boring, you must create everything around your responsibility, around your work, around your career, around your industry, around your business that excites you, that brings joy into your heart. And again, even though you could be the only one in active pursuit within the space that you find yourself, you must not forget that you must be motivated. It does not matter whether there is no one else to motivate you around you. You must motivate yourself. If you can do that, I believe you will finish well.
Another attitude that that believe is going to be of great help to you if you are a lonely marathoner, finding yourself in a stiff competition yet you are lonely. Again, you must tell yourself that even though you do not know how others are doing in this race, in the competition, you can set an example for them with your own success. You can break old records and you can set new ones. You must allow that to become the drive, the source of inner strength that you use in overcoming the difficulty in that competition.
While you do not know how your competitors are doing in the race, you must tell yourself that your life, your business, your marriage, whatsoever you are doing, whatever project you have started, could become an example for others. And so, you must learn to set new records with your own efforts. If you try to wait for the rest behind you, how do you break the old records? If you want to catch up with others, and then in the long run, you break down before you reach the finishing line, how will you successfully set a new record?
You must understand that in that race, you have your own space, you have your own pace and you have your own strength. Use your strength within your space to determine your pace unto success and as you do that, I believe you will become a better and a leading personality, one that everyone around you will learn from, observing your life, observing your pursuit, observing your accomplishment.
Alright, we have come to the end of the broadcast. I believe you have learned a few lessons. Don’t forget, you are not alone in that competition. The fact that you cannot see others around you does not mean that you are alone. So, you must not tell yourself, “let me take things easy, of course I am alone. If only I can calm down, others will catch up with me.” You don’t need to do that and you don’t need to overwork yourself trying to catch up with those ahead of you. Don’t forget you have your own pace; you have your own space and you have your own inner strength. Use the three to achieve your own success so that you will be able to set new records by breaking the old ones.
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If you have learnt something from this video, I want you to like it, share your comments with me and let us discuss things together. If you are new in this channel, I want you to subscribe, click the notification bell so that every time a new video is released in this channel, you are one of the first to get to know about it. My name is Gboyega Adedeji and I hope to connect with you again. Till then, I want you to remain motivated and inspired in spite of your loneliness and you will become a better and a leading personality.
Thank you.
